Protocol and etiquette

”a translator that is very good at both English and Japanese and that can advise on protocol and etiquette.” This is part of an inquiry received almost 4 days ago. I answered back that at the required date I was already booked. I passed the offer to a colleague who was available at that date. Unfortunately, the date moved and my colleague was no longer available. What happened later is a mystery for about two days, until the same request popped up now in the bulletin board service of the Japan Association of Translators. I am unsure whether there is a telling here, about the requesting side not clever or lucky enough to still look for an interpreter after a good 72 hours, or the possible reflexion that when looking from scratch for an interpreter in Tokyo, unless you go paying a commission to an agency, odds are low you can find one. That is, in the capital city of the third economy in the world. One should be taking this at least as a good news for interpreters shunning at and being shunned by agencies.


The other thing I found unique is the request for someone that "can advise on protocol and etiquette". The subject of protocol and etiquette is often raised, before meetings start. The visitor read before coming that Japan and formalism make one. That there are manners of business card exchange, and as in martial arts, there are only single proper ways to perform the "kata". There is the implicit that formalism, protocol and codified attitudes are markers of the Japanese side, whereas on the opposite, manicheanly speaking, there is spontaneity, rudeness, brawl, big laughters and lots of air being moved around at full speed. The iron clad businessman is preemptively ashamed and ill at ease with the risk of being and looking awkward, and messing things up. But a prospect explicitly looking for an interpreter cum majordomo and consultant in matters of manners is unique, until next time. 


One of the recurrent questions I am asked is about gifts and the timing for gift delivery. Usually, the gift comes at a first time business meeting. I don't know where this impression that a gift is needed at a first business meeting comes from. In my experience, Japanese businessmen meeting for the first time never exchange gifts. They meet for business. Why should this be different when Foreigners meet Japanese? Of course, there is no rule that forbid giving gifts but it may create a forced dynamic of reciprocity on the Japanese side if there is a next time. I have seen many exchanges of gifts among friendly partners though, and the question of timing is not properly answered by these examples. 


I asked the other day my students about gift offering timing. Most were puzzled but there was no general opinion. Some thought that at the beginning of the meeting was appropriate. Others felt that before parting was better. 


So much things get into the timing of delivery, things related to the mood and situation at stake, that I don't see a unique answer. But I usually suggest my clients to deliver during that window following the conclusion of the meeting and the departure, while everyone is still sitting but soon will call it quit.


Forms, protocol and manners are ways to behave in social interaction without fretting too much about how to behave. The Western side is under the feeling that protocol and manners are old smelly stuffs of an unnatural, stiffed upper lip world lagging behind even though so charming, when ladies clad in kimono perform. In schools here, the learning by doing about how to behave starts from day one. It doesn't guaranty off awkwardness, but at least, the rail tracks are visible. The wayward trackless Western side suddenly aware of its unruliness is put under pressure by itself when sensing that usual cowboy cordiality may not fit. 


Most of the time, awkwardness is a shared feeling, although the extent of it varies. Being a courteous self, often meaning containing voice and gestures excess, is easier than what the average Westerner may assume. The majority of clients naturally fit and my rule is to defuse the tension before the meeting by telling them there is no reasons to much fret about protocol. Being a gentle, listening self is usually enough to fit.