More Best of "Worst Roomate" Cereal killer

Did you see your cereal? There's something like the remains of roughly ten bags of it in the cabinet.

You kept buying it and buying it and there was no room for anything ELSE in the cabinets, so I condensed it by taking the cereal out of the giant boxes and putting the inner bags in a big plastic ziplock in order to save space.

Thinking back, I thought I even told you it was there.

I know I told you I had to put everything in Ziplocks because of the gnat infestation.

I told you early on, if there's anything you don't want me to touch, let me know.

I told you the things I don't want you to use (the last of the coffee, beyond that, go nuts.)

You never said don't eat your cereal. I told my kid to stop eating it, though-because it's sugary, as is milk, and I think of cereal as dessert, not breakfast (unless I am in some big huge rush, or busy and I want her to get her own breakfast-rare- so please do not point out the ONE or two times you saw me give her cereal for breakfast.).

I don't like my child to have junk, which is why I don't keep it around much. That's why you "never saw a kid so happy to get cereal." Not because she was "not eating." (read the ingredients on any box of cereal, including Raisin Bran. it's Sugar with more sugar.)

You should have told me if there was a problem, when there was a problem, IF there WAS a problem.

When I cook, I cook for everybody. I even made sure there was enough for your girlfriend, well after I couldn't stand her. I am not selfish with food.

You never said ONE thing about anyone eating anything until I drank a glass of wine out of your girlfriend's wine bottle. Five months after we became roommates.

She told you it was "expensive, twenty dollar wine."

1. It was gross. That's off-topic, I know, but also indicative of her being a liar as people "saving money to get their own place" (like you told me she told you she was doing) don't waste money on expensive bottles of disgusting tasting wine. What ever happened with that, anyway? That was over a year ago. How hard could it be to save money when you get a paycheck, AND unemployment, AND you don't pay rent anywhere?

2. That was the day you said you were babysitting for me and she was mad about it, even though I paid you one hundred dollars for one night of sitting around here, which you were doing anyway, and it was the only income you had seen in a couple of weeks. Still, she was pissed about it. Rather than treating it like a job, she treated it like a favor. Or something. I don't know...this is the girl who won't let you mention twenty years of your life, right? Because you were married before she was even born practically?

3. If something is off limits, write it on there. I am not gonna remember who bought the f*cking ketchup.

4. When a guest comes to my house (too) for eight weekends in a row and contributes nothing but one bottle of wine, drunk entirely by her, and, once, one half eaten jar of store bought salsa she got tired of at home, and a jar of fig chutney that sat in the fridge for eight months, molded, and finally got tossed (by the only person who has cleaned the fridge in two years-guess who), and then that same guest has no problem drinking, altogether probably at LEAST a liter of vodka, a gallon or two of Tomato juice, several cans of olives, and various snack foods provided by you and I, without fail, presented attractively and generously on each occasion that guest was present, and THEN, that guest has the gall to complain about a glass of wine drank from a bottle which was sitting in OUR fridge, with no "Private Wine, Do Not Drink" written on it...well, that guest, by general consensus, popular vote, and levelheaded opinions all around, is a B!TCH.

Oh, sorry, I mean a selfish, petty, immature bitch.